Letters of Their Lives
by Annic
Summary: The sequel to Letters. Will cover huge events in their lives.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I know I said that Letters was complete and that story is. However here is the sequel (Andorian Ice Princess). It is going to be a series of ficlets between Danny and Jamie that will also correspond with important events in their lives. This will be written as the inspiration strikes. Please R&R.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own them.**

**BB**

Even though Jamie and Danny continued to grow older, the letters continued to be exchanged. It was just between the two of them, for the rest of the family, had gone with the technology. They all tended to communicate in email or texting. However if it was a big event, it had become tradition that Danny and Jamie exchange letters. Each of them kept every letter that had been written between the two brothers.

The next one was the day Jack had been born. Danny spent the first hour of his son's life just staring in amazement, that this baby was his. His family was amazed at the change they saw in Danny's life in such a short time. Jamie could see that his oldest brother had changed, and it was for the better. He could tell that that his brother was scared of screwing up and messing up.

**BB**

Two days after Jack was born, Danny finally made it home. He had stayed with Linda and his new son for two days until his wife had ordered him to go home to freshen up and get a good sleep. He hadn't wanted to leave. As he walked into their kitchen he noticed a piece of paper laying on the table. He hesitantly picked up the letter and started to read it.

_Danny,_

_No matter what you try to tell yourself, Jack is lucky to have you as a father. I know that you would lay down your life to protect him just like you would do for Erin, Joe and I. You will show him just as much love and support as you do for Nicky. Jack struck the jackpot, you and Linda will make sure that he has everything he will need to grow up happy and healthy. Don't doubt yourself, Danny you are going to be a great father. Just look at the role model you had. Dad taught you everything you need to know to be a great father. Don't be afraid to ask him and mom for help. Don't worry, I am going to spoil Jack because he is my only nephew and I want you to know I would do anything to protect him. Enjoy the time your new family._

_Don't forget you always have me to call. Love ya brother._

_Jamie_

Danny didn't realize that he had been crying until he saw tears reach the paper. He wondered if he had been that obvious. Jamie always knew exactly what to say and when to say it. Instead of a letter, because he was too exhausted to write one, he called his baby brother. He knew that Jamie was still in school and left him a voicemail.

"Hey kid, it's Danny. Thank you for everything. "


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Tonight I was going to add a chapter onto my Untitled story, because I know I have left it hanging for a while. However the chapter was not going where I wanted it to, so I am starting over on the chapter. I hope to have it posted on Sunday or Monday. Tomorrow is my Master's program graduation, so I will busy. Hopefully you like chapter. Please R&R**

**Disclaimer: Still don't own them. If I did I would be playing Jamie's future wife on the show. Or shirtless Jamie and Danny more often. :)**

**BB**

"Hey kid, you sure you have everything? Because I think there is way too much stuff in this little tiny car," Danny joked. Even though he was joking he knew he was going to miss his baby brother. They were a lot closer than a lot of people were thought. Even though Jamie was only 17 when Jack was born, Linda had convinced Danny that Jamie was the best choice for godparent of Jack and any other children they would have in the future.

Danny had watched his brother grow up so much from the scrawny annoying child to proud and protective uncle. He knew that his brother would do anything for not only Jack and Sean but also for Nicky. He beamed with pride when Jamie had been named valedictorian at his high school graduation. He was even prouder when Jamie graduated with honors from college.

Now his brother was going to Harvard Law School. Of course Danny was a little disappointed when Jamie announced that instead of becoming a cop like every other male in the family; he was going to become a lawyer and had been accepted to Harvard. However he was proud to say that he was the brother of a Harvard law student, not that he had told Jamie that.

"Well, it's not everything, but it all the things that I need for my dorm in Boston," Jamie explained. He wouldn't admit it now but he was a little peeved that his oldest brother didn't tell him how he felt about him leaving. He hated that he had to leave his nephews; he had spent almost every weekend with them since Jack was born. However, it was Harvard and he could not turn down this opportunity. He felt that Danny and he had grown apart, ever since he had mentioned at dinner that he was moving to Boston. "I know that my room will be smaller than the one I had at NYU."

"Well if it's all the important stuff, don't forget we have the trailer and my car to fill if you need them," Danny mumbled. He was just glad that Linda had allowed for him to give up a rare day off to help Jamie move. He felt he needed to apologize to Jamie and let him know that he was prouder than ever of him. He felt horrible that it was his fault that they had been snippy with each other the past few months.

"You know, Danny, you don't have to help me move. I can do it on my own and they have people who can help me haul things in," Jamie mentioned. As his back was turned he didn't noticed his brother's flinch and frown.

"No, I want to help kid. Are you ready to go?"

**BB**

After a three hour drive, twenty minutes of registration and check-in, then about 45 minutes of moving things into Jamie's dorm room, Danny finally allowed himself to sit down and relax. He was hoping that his brother would want to grab dinner before he left to head back home. However that idea was cut when Jamie had walked into the common room with a bag of groceries. It didn't anger Danny, but disappointed him.

"Hey, kid, I am gonna head back home. I have to work an early shift and need to get back to sleep. Also I won't lie, I want to see my wife and boys awake at least once this week," Danny rambled as he grabbed his belongings. He almost forgot to give Jamie the picture that they had taken as a family only a few weeks before.

"Danny, are you alright? You seem a little down," Jamie asked concerned. His oldest brother had been quiet most of the trip. Which did not happen often.

"Yeah, everything is fine. I'll miss having you around to pick on. Also the boys will miss their uncle," Danny tried to laugh it off. He was more disappointed in himself than anyone else. "I almost forgot to give you these. Don't open them until I leave though, I don't want to see ya tear up."

"Okay….Thanks Danny, for everything. I'll miss ya too, but remember I am just a phone call away. I am always here. For anything." Jamie mentioned. It was almost as if he was comforting Danny. "Bye Danny, have a safe drive home."

"Thanks. See ya in a couple of weekends or at thanksgiving," Danny said as he walked out the door. He just hoped that his brother would see the letter soon.

**BB**

After three hours of organizing and stowing away some of his belongings he realized he had not opened the package that his brother had given him before he left. As Jamie started to unwrap the package, he realized that they were all pictures of his family. They were going to do family pictures together, however Jamie's move and everyone else's schedule didn't allow it. The first picture was of Erin, Nicky and Jack. He hadn't realized how much Nicky was starting to look like her mom.

The next picture was of his grandfather and grandmother before she had passed. Jamie still missed her. The other picture was of his mom and dad, he was so thankful that they had supported him as much as they did.

The next picture was of Danny and his family. Jamie was thankful that Danny had found someone that loved him as much as Linda did. She had stood by him through injuries and investigations. She also sat comforted him when he needed it. Linda had tamed Danny, and Jamie was so glad to see the family that Danny finally had.

The second to last picture was of Jamie, Nicky, Jack and Sean from last Christmas. His niece and nephews meant the world to him. He had made a promise to each of them that they would have a time each weekend that they could talk. It would give each of them something to look forward. He also made sure to tell them that they could call him with anything. He was there for them.

The last picture was the one that made Jamie tear up the most. It was one of all four (no spouses) of the Reagan children. They were all linked, arms slung over the others' shoulders, wear genuine and happy smiles. He noticed that there were no ill feelings in any of their smiles. One could tell that they had a strong, close relationship just by looking at that picture.

As Jamie started to situate the pictures that were given him, he noticed an envelope on his desk. He knew exactly who it was from.

_Jamie,_

_I hate to admit it but this move is going to be a lot harder on the family than any of the family. Even though Mom is going to be the emotional wreck because her baby boy is now three hours away, not just 30 minutes, I will admit I will miss you more than I have let on. _

_All four of us, with the exception of the two tours I did in Iraq, have always been within 30 minute drive of each other. We have always been close, the four of us. I am so sorry that we have been fighting; I don't know why I think it is the best way to send you off, because it isn't. _

_You know that we will all miss you like crazy. Erin and I need you as a buffer. The boys and Nicky need their uncle to keep them in check. And Joe can't be without his partner in crime. Just don't get too comfortable in Boston. I mean Boston, really? New York is home. _

_One last thing, remember that no matter what you do, I will always be proud to call you my kid brother. I am proud of the person you have become and proud of the person you are becoming. Love ya kid._

_Danny_

He didn't care that Danny was probably already home, he needed to call him, to thank him.

"Hey, Danny, thank you."


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I have hit a road block with my Untitled story. I know where I want it to go but it is not going in that direction. This chapter is kinda a two parter. The next one is going to be a little different, instead of Jamie or Danny writing to the other, it is going to be Mary. This was just a set up chapter for the next one. I must say thank you to my faithful reviewers, you guys keep me going. Thank you! Please R&R!**

**Disclaimer: Don't own them. If I did stilljustme, CBloom2 and I would be fighting over who gets to comfort Jamie. I, of course would take either of the Reagan boys :)**

**BB**

Of all the possibilities, of all the reasons for this phone call, Jamie didn't expect this. He knew that his mother had been sick for a while but the thought of cancer never crossed his mind.

"Jamie, sweetie, are you still there? I am going to fight this, I will try my hardest to beat this." His mom had just told him she had cancer and she was comforting him. That was always how his mother was. Making sure that her children were okay and putting them before herself.

"Yeah mom, I'm still here, just in a little bit of shock. Do you want me to come home? I am sure I could talk to my professors…." Jamie started but was interrupted by his mother.

"Jamison Reagan! Don't even think of leaving school because of me. You are going to finish and I am not going to be the reason you leave Harvard," his mom cried.

"Mom, please…does anyone else know?"

"Yeah, I told your brothers and sister earlier this morning. They all handled it pretty well, except for Danny, he almost ran out of the house. We haven't heard from since. Linda has been looking for him for about three hours." He didn't think Danny would take this news so badly. And on top of it all his normally responsible brother was missing. "You haven't heard from him have you? We are all worried about him here, especially Linda."

"No I haven't heard from him at all," Jamie said trying to find his voice again.

"Jamie, I'm going to be fine. Please know that," his mom assured him before hanging up.

As he sinks down on to the couch, he hears a knock on his door. His roommate is gone for the weekend and Sydney would walk right in. He wasn't expecting anyone. He slowly made his way over to the door and unlocked it. When he opened the door, part of his worry melted away.

"Danny, I'm glad you are okay. You had everyone worried," Jamie started but couldn't finish when he saw the tears in his brother's eyes. He couldn't help but take his oldest brother into a fierce hug. Danny and their mother had always been close. Jamie knew that if they lost their mom that Danny would be a mess.

"Mom, she's…." Danny couldn't finish.

"I know, she called me. She is going to fight this as hard as she can. But we'll have this time with her at least," Jamie comforted. "Who should I call first Linda or Mom?"

"Can you call Linda and tell her I'm sorry, I'm okay and I'll be home tomorrow, if it's ok that that I stay…" Danny questioned.

"Of course, stay as long as you want."

**BB**

Jamie and Danny had stayed up all night talking, venting and telling each other stories. When Jamie woke up the next morning to see his brother gone, he knew that Danny needed to be around the rest of the family. A smile creeps across his face when he notices that Danny had left him a note. He wondered if Danny had found the one that he snuck into his jacket.

_Jamie,_

_I didn't know how I would react if someone around me told them that they were sick. Unfortunately now we know. I don't know if I could deal with losing Mom, besides Linda, she is the most important women in my life. I don't want to know how long she has, I will keep her company at treatments, I will let her know that I love her and if need be I would donate to her in a heartbeat. I know you are going through the same pain as I am; you have just done a better job of dealing with it than I have. You always seem to know what to say to calm down Erin, Joe and I. I promise I will keep you up to date on everything going on with mom. And when we do lose her, it is a comfort knowing that I have you, Erin and Joe to keep me going and know cry with. We have each other. And at the moment we still have mom._

_Thank You Jamie. Love ya kid._

_Danny_

Jamie felt a few tears running down his cheeks. He knew his siblings would need him, just as much as he would need them in the coming events. It was something their parents had always harped on, staying close even though they grew older.

**BB**

When Danny arrived home he knew that he would have to put on a strong face for his boys. He knew that this was going upset them. When he walked into his quiet house he saw a little note that Linda had left him, telling him that they had run to the park but would be back for dinner. This allowed for him to let go of the emotions that plagued him the entire drive home from Boston. As he took his jacket off to drape over the chair he noticed and envelope stuffed into the inside pocket.

_Danny,_

_I honestly don't know what to do to make this any better for either of us. I don't want to lose her any more than you, Erin or Joe does. I know that this has been hard for you, just as it has for me. I had only found out that she was sick not even five minutes before you knocked on my door. Please know that I am always here for any of guys to call. And please don't forget about me, I am only three hours away. She is going to fight this, and we are going to stand by her every step of the way. _

_Love ya,_

_Jamie_


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Here is the second part of chapter 3. This was a little hard for me to write. There are going to be a few more emotional chapters spread through out the story but I am also going to try and keep it light. I have a four day weekend coming up, I may post another chapter to Untitled and to this one this weekend as well as start a new story. Again thank you to my reviewers. Please R&R.**

**Disclaimer: Still don't own them. If I did I would find a way to make CBloom2 and I, Reagans. :)**

**BB**

To say that they had one good year with their mom would be lying. They had some good days, when her treatments worked and she was the old Mary who would be up for anything. Playing with her grandchildren and loving on her children and husband. There were also bad days, when she would come home from treatments and sleep the entire time. Or only get out of bed to go to the bed room. Those were the days that Danny, Erin, and Joe hated to see her. There was also the incredibly bad days when Mary would have to stay at the hospital after treatments. Those days the siblings hated more than anything.

They would give Jamie daily updates as to what was happening; they promised not to hold anything back from him. Even though he was three hours away, he was still their brother and their mother was still sick. They kept hoping that their parents would come home and say that their mother was in remission and that the nightmare would be over. However all of that flew out the window when Frank and Mary came home on that fateful day.

She knew that the treatments were not working; she kept going to them so that she would be able to see her grandkids grow up. She kept going because she wanted to see her two youngest sons get married. She kept going for her family. She knew that they would be broken without her. How was she going to tell her sons that the treatments weren't doing what they were supposed to do? Even surgery wasn't an option anymore. She knew she had to tell her children all together. She couldn't tell them on the phone, like she had told Jamie that she was sick. She would call them and ask them all to come over. Someone would have to watch the kids.

Her husband was not dealing with news well at all. When they told her that she only had a couple months left with her family she sat in shock. When she locked over at Frank she could see tears running down his face. All she could do was take him into her arms and let him cry. She knew her first call would be to her youngest.

"Hey, mom! How are you doing?" Jamie asked happily. She hated to wreak his good mood. She could tell he was enjoying law school. He had a wonderful girlfriend, whom Mary knew Jamie wanted to wed. If only she would see that. "Mom, are you okay?"

"Jamie, could you come home tonight or tomorrow? I really need to talk to you and your siblings and I want to do it with you all here. I can't…not over the phone," Mary managed to ask.

"Yeah, I can be there tonight, I am done with classes for the week. Mom, is everything alright?" Jamie all but whispered.

"Not over the phone, son. I will see you in a few hours."

She had the same conversation with all of her children. Some were harder to do than others but they needed to know.

**BB**

When she walked into the living room, she saw her four children and Linda sitting on the couch, almost grasping at each other. She could read it on her oldest son's face. Danny knew something was up and would not let Linda go. Next Danny was her daughter Erin, she knew that Erin would not handle it well. On opposite sides of the couch were her two youngest Joe and Jamie. They already looked lost. What would they be like when they heard the news. She knew it was now or never.

Before she could say something to let them know she was in the room, Danny looked up and realized that whatever news was coming would not be good. He could always read his family like books; it was because of that skill that he made a great detective. She was so proud of that fact.

"Mom, it's not good news is?" Danny asked, afraid of the answer that he was going to get.

"No, son, it's not. I…the treatments aren't working. There is nothing else they can do," Mary tearfully explained. She could hear sobs starting to come from her daughter.

"Not even surgery?" Joe asked.

"Nope, that could spread it. I have a few months. Let's please make the most out of the time we have. You guys mean the world to me. I want you to remember me in a happy way not in a sickly way," Mary finished.

"Of course, Mom, what did you have planned."

**BB**

By that September, she was gone. Everyone in her family knew that is was coming. By her last day she had said her goodbyes to her grandchildren, in-laws, husband, and her beloved children. She made Danny promise to look out for his younger siblings. She made Erin promise that no matter that she do as much as she can to be the best mother she can for Nicky. She made Jamie and Joe promise that they would always have each other's backs.

After the funeral, they all shielded themselves from the outside world and allowed each other to break down and cry into each other's embrace. After everyone had left, leaving the family still reeling from the loss of Mary, their father approached them hold four letters. Each wanting to read their letter but choosing to wait. Little did they know they would end up sharing them in a few years.

**BB**

As Erin arrived home, she clenched the last letter her mother had written to her. The fact that her mother had felt that she had to write to her children still made Erin's heart ache for her mother. She wanted her children to know that she was at peace.

_Erin,_

_When I was told I was going to have a daughter I was elated. Danny will always be my first born, but you are my daughter. The love I have for you is different than what I have for your brothers. I am so proud of the women you have become. You are an amazing aunt, sister, daughter, wife and mother. Nicky is so lucky to have you. Let her know how much you love her. That you are proud of her. Make sure you keep your brothers in line. Joe and Jamie won't need your guidance as much but Danny will need you. Even though he has Linda, I will always worry about him; make sure you are always there for him. You two have always fought, but in the end you two always cared about each other. Jamie and Joe are going to need that motherly figure in their life that I can no longer be there for. Make sure that is you. I love you Erin, don't you ever forget that. _

_Mom_

As she finished the letter, she let herself sink to the floor and the sobs take over her body. She needed her brothers now more than ever.

**BB**

Joe had always a different relationship with his mother. It wasn't that he didn't love her, he adored her and loved her with all of his heart. He was always closer to his father than his mother. And closer to Jamie than he was to Danny and Erin. He didn't mean to separate the family like that however it just happened. Now he wished he had told his mother that he loved her more. As he walked into the apartment he shared with Angela, he sunk down into the couch, and began to read the letter that his mother had written.

_Joe,_

_My middle son, the peace-keeper between the oldest and the youngest, the one that could always make us laugh, no matter what the situation. Your siblings and your father will look to you for those same qualities to get them through this. I hate to tell you this but you were not an accident you were the only planned child of the four. We were expecting you. We had wanted to give Erin and Danny another sibling. And we were given you. You always knew how to put a smile on everyone's face. I am proud of the man you have become. Make sure you tell Angela how you feel about her; she is the one for you. I just wish I could see you marry her. Please be careful on the streets. I love you Joe, always have been and always will be._

_Mom_

He just let himself weep. As he felt the letter drop to the floor, he also felt the arms of his girlfriend wrap around him and with that he let the tears flow freely.

**BB**

Jamie wasn't sure where to go to read the letter. He wasn't sure he wanted to read it in the first place. He started to wonder the street. Before he knew it, he was on Danny's front porch. He almost couldn't bring himself to knock. He had just began to turn away to when the door opened.

"Jamie, what are you…you had us worried," Linda exclaimed as she hugged him. It was as if she didn't want to let him go. "Come in, Danny is on the couch staring at the envelope."

"I don't…" Jamie started but found he couldn't continue.

As he followed his sister-in-law into the living room, he saw his brother on the couch just inside the door.

"I just let him be, I know he'll need me tonight, but I think he needs his siblings right now. If you need me, I'll be upstairs with the boys," Linda explained.

"Hey, Danny."

"Hi, kid, I am trying to convince myself to read the letter, but once I read the letter it will finally sink in that she is gone. I don't know how I can deal with her being gone Jamie…I don't…" Danny started to sob.

Taking a deep breath Danny started to read the letter,

_Danny,_

_You have always been the child that caused the most trouble. I wouldn't trade you for anything. When the doctors first place you in my arms, I fell in love with you right there. You are my first born and because of that you and I always had a different relationship. I knew I could trust you with the younger ones, yet you grew up right before my eyes. From the time I first held you to when you came home from Iraq, you grew from a little boy to an amazingly strong young man. I am proud of the family you built with Linda. Jack is a spitting image of you when you were his age. Let him grow yet be the father he needs. I saw you change the first time you held Jack, and I wouldn't change it for the world. Make sure you watch out for your brothers and sister. They are going to need you. Make sure you don't fight too much with Erin. Stay close with Joe. And lastly please repair the close relationship you had with Jamie. Even though you may not know it, he looks up to you. I love you, Danny, don't ever forget that._

_Mom_

"She always knew how to make me feel better," Danny whispered.

"Yeah, she did. I guess it's my turn," Jamie started.

_Jamie,_

_My baby boy. I never expected to have another child after Joe. You were a surprise. However you proved to be the glue that held us all together. The only thing I ever regret with you is the age difference between you and your brothers and sister. Believe it or not, they were all excited to have another sibling, Danny was scared and Joe wanted to stay the baby of the family. That was until they held you for the first time. You have that quality about you that makes people fall for you right away. I wish I could watch you marry the girl of your dreams. My hope for you is that you will find someone like Linda, someone that will stand by you no matter what. I hope you are just as lucky as Danny. Stay close with Joe, you two always had the best relationship of the four. Become the best little brother for Erin, she is going to need you. And please repair the relationship you once had with Danny. You are always going to need each other. He is always there for you. My baby boy, I am going to miss you all. I love you Jamie._

_Mom_

After the letters were finished they allowed for each other to be comforted through the sobs and the tears. Knowing they still had each other was the most important thing.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: I know I said that this would be updated as the inspiration struck. However I have had so many ideas for this story pop up that I can't not write it. I know I will post another chapter this weekend. Maybe even before then. I wanted this one to be light-hearted but I ended up messing up the brotherly relationship I had made them have. LOL. I have ideas of where I want this story to go at least ten chapters. Possibly even more. Please R&R**

**Thanks to my loyal reviewers! :)**

**Disclaimer: Don't own them, if I did stilljustme, CBloom2 and I would be Reagans :)**

**BB**

After his mother had passed away, the relationship with Jamie had with his siblings pretty much stayed the same. Danny and he had tried to repair their relationship but it was slow going. Jamie still went to Joe with pretty much everything. Jamie and Erin had become closer; she was starting to have problems with her husband and sought out solace in talking with her baby brother. Every time Jamie came home for the weekend it was spent with his godsons, his nephews. Even if Sydney had come home with Jamie that weekend, she would accompany him, Jack and Sean on trips to the park, lunch, movies or whatever the plan was.

Danny could tell that Jamie had fallen, fast and hard for Syd. He wasn't sure that she was the one for his brother. Danny knew that if Jamie felt she was the one, than he would support Jamie. He just did not want to see his brother heartbroken because Sydney fell out of love with Jamie. She came from a different type of family than Jamie. Her entire family had money and numerous houses up and down the east coast. The Reagans worked hard for what they had and were proud to have it. What it boiled down to was Danny wanting to protect his brother.

When Jamie came home from school for a weekend unannounced, Danny knew something was up. As they waited for the boys to come home from school, Jamie casually asked about finding a ring.

"Hey Danny, how did you find Linda's engagement ring?" Jamie asked. He knew that it had not been anything spectacular, but it was something that Danny had saved every pay check for. It had taken Danny six months to find the perfect ring. He remembers Danny fretting over the idea that Linda would say no or not like the ring. However, the family could tell that as soon as Danny was on one knee in front of her, that she was going to say yes. After time, Linda would tell the family that she knew she was going to marry Danny from the moment he had asked her out.

"As you know, it took me almost six months to find the perfect one. And even with the one I picked out, I doubted. After I proposed to her I realized that it did matter what the ring looked like, I just wanted to have Linda in my life. You looking for one now?" Danny asked.

"Um….Yeah I think so. I don't know where I am going to find it, I just know that…Yeah," Jamie stumbled over the words. "I was going to ask Dad but he is still…he still misses mom. I know I do."

"Yeah, me too kid. Me too."

**BB**

After talking to his father and failing to find the right ring, he was sitting in his childhood living room, holding his mother's engagement ring.

"Dad, are you sure you are ready to…I mean…it's mom's ring… and…"Jamie was speechless. He couldn't believe that his Dad had given his mother's ring to propose to Sydney to. "Are you sure Danny, Erin, and Joe are alright with this? I mean…"

"Jamie, this is going to be on the finger of the women you love. I loved your mother since the day I met her, as much as I miss her, this ring should be on Sydney's hand. As for Danny and Erin they are already married and Joe hasn't spoken of marrying Angela anytime soon. So it's yours," Frank explained.

**BB**

When Jamie proposed, there was no doubt that Sydney would say yes. She was a little shocked that he had given her his mother's ring. She knew that she had found the love of her life.

**BB**

Danny, was not in the least bit surprised that Jamie was now engaged. He had to let his brother live his life and not interfere any more than was needed.

_Jamie,_

_I am glad that you have found the love of your life. I hope that you love Sydney as much as I love and treasure Linda. I can't wait to stand up in the front of the church with you and Joe as you wait for Sydney to walk down the aisle. I just want you to be careful. It is not that I don't trust Sydney because I do. I trust her with you and my sons' lives. I just don't want to see you hurt. I am sure that Sydney will take good care of you and you in turn will take care of her. I love you little brother, I don't want you hurt. If you hate me after this I am sorry. If you ever need me, you know you can call me._

_Danny_

After Jamie read the letter, he was angry that his brother could not be happy for him. He wanted to become better friends with Danny. They had slowly been working towards that, now however he wasn't sure they could ever be close again.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Here is another tear-jerker of a chapter. Some of this chapter is taken for chapter 2 of Loss of A Brother. There was going to be another chapter between the last one and this one but this one was bugging me so I eliminated that filler. I am not 100% happy with this chapter but oh well. As for my story Untitled, I think that it is going to be put on temporary hiatus. I have hit a serious roadblock. So instead of writing for that one, this one will get all of my attention until my muse is back for that one. I must thank my loyal readers and reviewers (if I forget any of you I am so sorry), riowolf, miguard, CBloom2, and stilljustme. You guys keep me writing. Please R&R.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own them. If I did I would be the long lost cousin of the Reagans or the new wife of Jamie...**

Before they knew it three years had passed. Jamie was in his final year at Harvard. He had an amazing fiancé that he could not wait to marry. He and Joe were still incredibly close. They talked almost every day. Erin had started to talk and confide in him more. He was still very close with his niece Nicky, whenever he was home for a weekend or a break, he was always taking her to movies, dinner, plays, among other things.

He still also was able to see his nephews just as much, he loved spending time with his godsons. Jamie was still incredibly honored to have that responsibility. When he looked at Jack and Sean interacting, he saw his oldest brother Danny and him. Before their relationship had fallen apart. He still couldn't point to exactly when it happened or why. They had started to build it after their mother had passed but when he had proposed to Sydney. He felt that Danny didn't like Syd, that he was making Jamie choose between his family and Sydney. He had chosen Sydney. The rest of the family had been happy for him. Danny had even acted like he was happy for them as well. After a few months of barely talking and Jack and Sean asking questions why they never saw or heard from their godfather, Linda had called to ask that even though him and Danny were not getting along to not take it out on the boys. Jamie knew it wasn't fair and agreed. He just wished he and Danny could bury the hatchet and move past whatever was forcing them apart. Little did each know that it would be their brother that would bring them closer again.

**BB**

It had been a long day, Jamie had been on campus for classes and studying since 10 the previous morning. The last study group of the night had just wrapped up and he was heading home to sleep. He hadn't seen his fiancé since he left their apartment off campus.

With dead week next week and then finals the following week, he was looking forward to spending some quality time with Sydney when she wasn't with her family. He was also looking forward to spending time with his family, especially his nephews. Things hadn't really thawed between Danny and him but they were civil towards each other. Both Linda and Sydney had pleaded with them to repair their relationship, but their schedules had prevented it this far. With Jamie living in Boston nine months out of the year and Danny a senior detective, they didn't really have all that much time to do see each other. But then again neither of them had really made an effort.

He really didn't want to look at his watch because he knew that it was well after midnight. No matter what time it was he still had to get up at ten the next morning to attend another study group. As much as he was going to miss his friends, he was not going to miss all the studying that came with being a law student. When he finally managed a glance at his watch he was shocked to see that it was 2:45 am. He had been in that study group for over six hours.

"Hey Sam! I'll meet you for study group on Monday. That way I am ready for the test," Jamie laughed.

"I don't think you will need to study for the test you already know too much. But then again, we are almost to the end of the program," Sam chuckled.

"Don't forget about the one in the morning, or should I say later today as well." Jamie reminded.

"Oh, damn! I totally forgot about that one," Sam remembered.

As he started to walk away from his friend and towards his car he felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. He figured it was Sydney calling to see if he would be home at all tonight. But as he finally dug it out of his pocket, the name on the display shocked him, Danny.

Danny never called him unless it was to ask when he was picking the boys up. It was never to chat, and never at this time. Never this late. In all his shock, he didn't realize that he had let the phone call go to voicemail. He hadn't realized that his heart was beating so fast. He waited for the tone to let him know that there was a message, but it never happened, instead his phone rang again.

Danny.

He could not allow this call to go to a message.

"Danny?" Jamie questioned. "What is it?"

All he heard was a gasp and soft sobbing on the other end of the phone. His oldest brother rarely every cried. He saw a few tears fall when his sons were born. Also he saw a few tears escape during his wedding to Linda. The last time he had heard or seen his brother cry was…his mother. Who was it now? Was it his father? His grandfather? Who was it?

"Jamie….Jai…" Danny struggled to explain to his brother what had happened.

"Danny, what's wrong? You are scaring me."

"Kid…It's Joe…he's…he's gone."

And with that Jamie's world halted. He could not believe what he had just heard. The only way he knew his brother was telling the truth was the soft crying that could be heard on the other end. His legs no longer able to support him, he sank to the curb as he started to cry.

"What? Danny, how? When?" Jamie asked.

"Not over the phone Jamie. Please come home, we need you, Grandpa, Dad, Erin, and me…Please kid?" Danny pleaded.

All Jamie wanted to do was get home and take his brother and sister in to his arms and cry.

"I'll drive home and get some clothes and be right there. I'll be there in a few hours," Jamie somehow managed to whisper.

"Oh my…Are you on campus?" Danny softly whispered.

"I just….study…." Jamie started but couldn't finish.

"Kid, go home, sleep and then come home. We can't lose you because you haven't slept. Please be careful," Danny wept. The next words shocked him, "I love ya kid…"

**BB**

The next morning he woke up after just two hours of sleep. When he arrived home he couldn't keep himself from breaking down. Joe, his brother, his best friend, was gone. He still couldn't believe it. Sydney had tried to comfort him as best as she could. She offered to go home with him, to be his support, but he refused. He felt he needed his family and only his family right now. He had Syd call Sam to let the study group know he wouldn't be there, that he wouldn't be home for a week or so. Sydney also said she would talk to his professors for him. He felt he needed to get home to his family. He wondered how his father was holding up. How Erin and Nicky were dealing. His thoughts though were flooded with the sound of Danny crying over the phone. He couldn't get the image out of his mind.

As he started the drive back to New York, he felt himself being overcome, by emotion more than once. He couldn't drive while his vision was blurred because of tears. Instead of taking 3 hours to get home it took him 5.5 hours to get to his father's house.

As he rolled up to his father's house, he saw his brother Danny sitting on the front steps, his head in his hands. He saw that his shoulders were shaking and that he was trying to get his emotions in check. When he turned off the car, the sight that he saw on his brother's face shocked him. He saw pain, shock, hurt, and loss. Danny had seemed to age ten years since the last time he had seen him.

"Jamie," Danny's voice cut in to his soul.

"Kid….our brother….he's…" Danny couldn't finish.

Jamie couldn't stand to see his brother cry anymore and broke down himself. Embracing his brother and quietly crying with each other, he felt his sister's soft touch on his cheek and quickly took her into their embrace, the three of them silently comforting each other. Praying that they will be okay, they have each other to get through it.

**BB**

After the funeral, the family had stayed attached to each other. No one had wanted to leave the other, for they knew that they all needed each other. Jamie found himself looking at pictures of him, Joe, and Danny from when he was younger. He wished that he could have gone back to that time, everything was easier. Everything was alright.

"You know, kid he was proud of you. As am I. Don't ever forget that," Danny pleaded.

"I know. I just hate that we have built this wall between us. Joe had been our bridge. And now he is gone. How can he be gone Danny?" Jamie broke down.

"I don't know kid," Danny comforted. He knew that his baby brother needed to go back to school. That he needed to finish what he had started. However he didn't want to chase his brother away. "Kid, Joe would want you to finish and graduate from Harvard…"

"I…I don't know if I can. I mean I don't want to leave you guys, you guys need me. I need you guys," Jamie started. "How can I celebrate a happy event when we just lost Joe? I don't know if I can."

"You need to finish, if not for you then for our brother for dad. Please?"

**BB**

After Danny had gone to bed that night, for they were all staying in their father's house, Jamie stayed up to look at more pictures. When he walked up the stairs, past Joe's old room and into his childhood room, he noticed a letter laying on the bed. He smiled. Tradition.

_Jamie,_

_I know you are hurting just as much as I am. He was my little brother, my partner in crime, but he wasn't my best friend like he was yours. The past few nights I find myself asking, 'why him? Why not me?' I don't know how to answer either of those questions. I was supposed to protect him, and I couldn't I couldn't and didn't protect him from whomever killed him. I feel that you, Erin, and Dad blame me for this happening to Joe. _

_Even though it is not in the forefront of your mind, I want you, as does the rest of the family to return to Boston. To finish what you started four years ago. You are two weeks away from graduating with a law degree. You have no idea how proud I am of you for that. I know that your mind is not on those exams. It is on the family. We want you to finish. It is what Joe would have wanted. _

_ And when you go back to Boston, know that we will continue what we do and that is stand by one another. And when you walk across that stage, I am going to be there in the audience with Linda, Jack and Sean cheering you on. _

_Danny_

_P.S. I am sorry for everything. _

Jamie cried himself to sleep.

**BB**

Two weeks later was graduating with honors from Harvard Law School. And true to his word, was Danny, Linda, Jack and Sean, cheering when his name was read. The past few years had been heartbreaking but he was ready to move on. Move on from Law School and begin a new chapter. How was he going to tell his family?

"Hey, kid! Over here!" Danny yelled over the noise.

"Uncle Jamie!" Jack had yelled trying to get his attention.

"Hey guys. Thanks for being here. I appreciate it. Did you record it for Erin and Dad?"

"Yep, I did," Jack smiled.

"Hey boys, why don't we leave your Dad and uncle alone for a few minutes?" Linda asked sensing that the two brothers needed to talk.

Before they could have a moment, Sydney snuck in to make sure they were ok. "Hey sweetie. Danny. How are you doing? I was going to go celebrate with my parents, unless..."

"No, go ahead Syd celebrate with your mom and dad," Jamie said. He was so grateful to have her. She had helped him through two of the toughest times.

"Jamie," Danny started. He never called him Jamie unless he was trying to be serious. "I am so proud of you…and I know Joe would have been too."

"Thanks, Danny…um…listen I have something I need to tell you."


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Here is the next chapter. It seems a little haphazard to me, but this is the best that this chapter could have turned out. I have some ideas for most of the story, however I need some extra ideas for filler chapters. Requests wanted. :) I hate to say but I have decided that Untitled has been placed on Hiatus. My muse for that has decided to go on a road trip to follow a certain band on tour. Thank you to my reviewers and readers. Your kind words keep me writing. **

**Disclaimer: Don't own them. Darn.**

"Thanks, Danny…um…listen I have something I need to tell you."

"Um… when do you leave tomorrow?" Jamie asked, scared of how his brother would react to the news that he was about to tell him. He was afraid that it would not be a pretty scene if he told him here.

"I think we are leaving around noon tomorrow. I have to work at 6 tomorrow evening. Kid, is everything okay? You are scaring me," Danny asked. He knew Jamie was hiding something but he didn't want to press the issue. The loss of Joe was still too fresh in his mind to even think about losing his baby brother somehow. Even thinking about the possibility of it made him tear up.

"Hey Danny, don't cry, please don't. It's nothing bad," Jamie started. "I want to tell you before anyone else. Meet me at my apartment at ten?"

"Yeah of course. I'll be there unless you want to do earlier," Danny started.

"How about nine instead?"

"That works for me, but right now I think your nephews want to go get some food with their uncle, to help him celebrate," Danny changed the subject.

"Food, I could definitely go for some food," Jamie laughed.

"Uncle Jamie, since you graduated, does that mean you get to move back to New York?" Jack excitedly asked.

"Yeah and I get to spend more time you with you and your brother. And your dad," Jamie smiled. He was glad that they were able to re-build their relationship.

**BB**

"Hey babe, everything okay?" Linda asked quietly since the boys were asleep in the next bed over. Her husband had been quiet since they had dropped Jamie off at his apartment three hours before.

"Yeah, I think so. It's just Jamie…He told me he had something to tell me, but lost the courage to explain it. I am just worried is all," Danny explained. "I am sure he is fine but he wants to talk tomorrow before we leave."

"Well whatever he going to tell you, make sure that he knows you are supporting him. That you are there for him. You don't want to lose what you guys have rebuilt," Linda comforted.

"I know, I will. I think it is time for bed. What do you think?" Danny asked.

**BB**

When the next morning rolled around, he found himself dreading talking to his brother. He didn't know what the news was but he was sure that it could affect their friendship.

"Be careful, I am here if you want to talk," Linda whispered as Danny leaned down to give her a kiss. He just smiled at her, but it wasn't a true smile. He was worried about his brother.

Instead of going straight to Jamie's apartment, he drove around Boston. He had to clear his head from all of the what-ifs. What it could be, what had happened, was it bad or was it good news. His over active imagination running wild with the possibilities. Before he knew it, his brother was calling him to ask where he was at. He hadn't realized that he was running late. After letting himself know that he will be over in a few minutes, he climbed back into his car and drove to Jamie's place. Who knew what he was going to be told.

As he drove up to Jamie's apartment, he saw his brother waiting outside for him. He could see on Jamie's face the anticipation and fear. It was almost as if Jamie was afraid to tell his brother whatever he was going to tell him.

"Why don't we go for a walk Danny?" Jamie asked uncertainly. He hadn't wanted to tell his brother in his apartment for he only sprung this on Sydney the night before. To say that she was surprised was an understatement. She hadn't said one word to him all morning.

"Sure, where did you want to go?"

"There is the place on campus that I used to go when I needed to think. I went there when I knew mom wasn't doing very well. I went there after I talked to Joe for the last time. Usually it was to calm down from fights I had with my roommates, Sydney and," Jamie paused, " and you."

That hit Danny deep down. He knew that he and his brother fought a lot, however he didn't think that their fights had affected him that much.

"Danny, I need to tell you this because, Dad or Erin can't be the first in the family this. Also I don't want you to interrupt because I need to tell you this." Jamie took a deep breath and continued. "Joe could always tell when I wasn't happy. A couple of weeks before Joe was killed, he mentioned that I didn't sound happy or excited about being a lawyer anymore. He asked what I really wanted to do. I told him, I told him I always wanted to follow in grandpa's, dad's, yours and Joe's footsteps. Danny, I want to become a cop. I have already been accepted into the academy, and I don't plan on taking the bar. I start classes in about a month," Jamie finished. He had heard his brother gasp when he finally revealed that he wanted to be a cop. He though that anything that they had fought to rebuild was gone, he had effectively just lost his last brother. And it was his fault.

"Are you sure that this is what you want to do kid?" Danny asked. He couldn't believe what he had just heard. He had lost his younger brother not even a month ago. Now his baby brother was effectively taking his place. At first he had been upset that Jamie had chosen law over the NYPD but as time went on he was proud of Jamie. After burying Joe, he was glad that Jamie had stuck with law school. Now everything had changed.

"Yes, I am sure. Losing Joe reaffirmed that I wasn't meant to be a lawyer, I was meant to be a cop. It's in our blood," Jamie whispered.

"I can't lose you too Jamie. I will support you, even though right now I am not too thrilled about it. However, I will not tell Dad, you have to do that," Danny explained. On the outside he may sound like he was angry but on the inside he was scared.

"I am sorry to spring this on you now but I needed to tell someone. Syd wasn't too happy about this. I told her last night. She hasn't talked to me since," Jamie tried to joke. However it came out as a gasp. He knew that his news would not thrill anybody but he didn't think it could him to lose those closest to him.

"Here," Jamie started as he reached into his pocket and pulled out an envelope. Danny knew exactly what it contained. "Please don't read it until you get home. I don't want to see you mad at me."

"I'm not mad kid, just surprised. I never expected this from you. Listen, I need to go pick up Linda and the boys and head home. Gotta work tomorrow," Danny changed the subject. "I'll see you when you get home. Next week?"

"Yeah next week," Jamie sighed. "Have a safe drive home." As he hugged his brother goodbye, he thought that it could have gone better. He just hoped that the letter explained his decision, that his brother would understand.

**BB**

After they had arrived home from their weekend trip to Boston, Linda had the boys unpack their bags and settle down before dinner. As Danny started to get ready for work, he recalled the conversation he had had with his baby brother before they left. He reached for the letter he had set on the night table when they arrived home.

_Danny,_

_I know you may not be happy with my decision. However, I have always felt the draw to become a cop. Even when I was younger I knew it was something I wanted to do. When I watched you graduate from the academy, I knew I wanted to be just like my oldest brother. In short I wanted to be like you, whether you realize it or not, I have and always will look up to you. _

_I couldn't tell mom and Erin that I didn't want to be a lawyer, had you ever tried to tell either of them no, when it came to big life decisions? Being in law enforcement is in our blood. I can't ignore it. I am not doing this to honor Joe or replace him. No one could ever replace him. I am doing this for myself. I am doing this because I feel that it is what is right for me. _

_This would be a lot easier if I have your blessing and support to follow in your footsteps. However if you feel that you cannot do that, I understand. You'll always be my brother no matter what, I just ask for your support in this. _

_Jamie_

_P.S. Please know that I never hated you. You are my brother._

Danny would support his brother no matter what he chose. He just wished that he didn't have to hide this secret.

"Dammit Jamie," he whispered into the silence of his bedroom.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Sorry for the lack of updates, RL has been kinda hectic for me lately but it has slowed down once again. I also have had a few issues with writer's block. This is my best one from all the drafts on this chapter. I hope you enjoy this. Thanks to all of my loyal reviewers. You keep me writing. Please R&R.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them, if I did I would be part of the show.**

**BB**

This was the day Jamie had been looking forward to for months. He was excited yet scared. He was graduating from the police academy. He had already met his TO, Sargent Renzuilli, who had also been Joe's TO. Mentioning Joe had become a little bit easier over time. Danny, Erin, and Jamie still felt the void that had been left behind when Joe was killed.

Even with all of the classes that he went through, he knew nothing could compare to the education he would get his first day on the streets. He was also lucky his family stood by him during his time at the academy. It had not been easy for him to tell his family. Watching the expression on his father's face change from hopeful to scared and worried, killed him. He wasn't sure at the time that if he was going to have his family's support. However he had been wrong, once he started classes, his family had backed him 100%.

Sydney, on the other hand, hadn't been very excited about the idea since Jamie had sprung it on her the day of graduation. She was expecting to marry a Harvard lawyer not an NYPD beat cop. As much as he knew that he had disappointed her, he was glad that she still stood by him. That she still wanted to marry him. At least that he knew.

Also Danny had stood by him and supported him just like he said. Even though the old insecurities were always there, they had rebuilt the friendship that they had had before; however it wasn't anywhere near the friendship Jamie and Joe had shared. He could tell that even though Danny was supporting him, he could see the fear and worry burned into his face.

"You ready Jamie?" Sydney asked from the bathroom. "We need to be there early so I can save spots for Danny, Linda, Erin, Nicky and the boys. With you family they should just rope off an area just for you guys, it is a large family and a pretty important one too."

"Yeah, I am almost ready, just have to but the coat on," Jamie replied. Putting the coat on meant it was real, that he was done. He wished his brother, mom, and grandmother were able to see this. Just thinking of Joe made him tear up. It had only been a little over a year, it was still a soft spot for Danny, Erin and him.

"Here, let me help you," Sydney offered. She could see the emotion in his face. "I am proud of you Jamie, and I know Joe and your mom would be as well. They are today, don't forget that."

"Thanks, Syd. How did I get so lucky?" Jamie asked in amazement.

"Well you are pretty cute. So that helps," Sydney teased. She was excited that Jamie was finally done, however she was more worried now because her fiancé was going on patrol in two days. "As long as we are able to use those handcuffs for some fun later on I will be pleased."

"Sydney!"

**BB**

As Danny looked out over the crowd, it wasn't hard to find his baby brother. Even though he still secretly wished that Jamie had become a lawyer, he knew that he was going to be a great cop. Linda always teased him that Jamie was going to be after his job. As he watched his father read through the names an present them with their ranks. When he reached Jamie's name, Danny and Erin could tell that he was proud and yet scared.

"Jamison Michael Reagan," his father announced. As he walked across the stage, everyone in the crowd knew who the newest officer was. As they embraced in a private moment, the crowd applauded.

"Thanks Dad, I mean sir," Jamie smiled.

**BB**

The original plan after graduation was to go to dinner as a family. However Danny was called away on a kidnapping that had ended the way everyone had wanted. Danny had been in some trouble for the arrest, but in his defense, he had gotten the guy. After his shift was over, Danny made his way over to Jamie and Sydney's loft. He had to give his congratulations and tell his brother how extremely proud he was.

After a few knocks with no response, Danny slid the letter under the door and texted Jamie wishing him congratulations, he told him that he owed him dinner and a beer.

**BB**

As Sydney and he arrived home from dinner with Erin and Nicky, a dinner which had filled him up, he realized just how lucky he was to have the family he had. As he opened the door he noticed an envelope on the floor.

"Hey Sydney, why don't you go ahead and start the movie, I'll be right back," Jamie explained as he made his way into the office.

_Jamie,_

_I cannot tell you how extremely proud I am of you right now. To see you walk across that stage and shake the PC's hand, aka dad, the same stage that Joe and I had walked across I became a little teary-eyed. There are going to be moments when I wished you had stayed with law. However it is not going to be because you are not good enough to do it, it is because I worry about you. My baby brother is a cop. Linda and I, and dad and Erin all believe that you will be the best cop in this family. Admit it you are going to be after my job in no time. I love ya kid, and again I am so proud of you._

_Danny_

_P.S. You know Joe and Mom are smiling down on you now. I still owe you that beer._


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: This is a little different chapter. Instead of Danny writing the letter to Jamie, it is Sydney. This is part one of the chapter. I would like to thank all of you guys for reading this story. There are quite a few chapters I have planned. Thanks to my loyal reviewers (you know who you are). Please R&R.**

**Disclaimer: Only for entertainment. Don't own any thing. **

**BB**

As she walked out of the apartment she had shared with Jamie, she felt her heart start to break into a million little pieces. Had she really just done that? Had she really just walked out on the love of her life, on her fiancé? She had known from the day that she met Jamie that she had wanted to marry him. His smile always struck a chord with her and his laugh always made her smile. The dedication he had showed to his family, especially to his niece and nephews made her love Jamie even more. Even though they had very little in common they had made things work between the two of them.

Looking back on that now, they shouldn't have had to force things to work with them. She was from a wealthy family that expected the next generation to make just as much money or more. She had her career mapped out for her from the moment she told her mother that she wanted to be a lawyer. She was set on the fast track to becoming a big time lawyer. Jamie on the other hand, had come from a family of cops. They had fought hard for their living and they were a proud family. Sydney had come to love his entire family, even Danny.

She didn't anticipate Jamie telling her that he was giving up law to become a cop. It scared her. She had decided to stand by him and his decision even though she saw what his family had been through when they lost Joe. She wanted to marry him more than anything; however, the shooting in Chinatown had scared her. She could have easily been had an officer standing at her door telling her Jamie was gone. Even though he had stood in their kitchen reassuring her that he was ok, that they were ok, she didn't believe it. She had noticed that he had started to become more distracted. He would stay up for hours on his computer researching who knows what.

As she looks down at her bare left hand she lets the tears fall without abandon. She had done what was the easiest thing for her sanity. She knew wasn't fit to be a cop's wife. She wasn't strong enough. But even if it was easy, was it the best? She knew that giving the ring back was the right thing. What hurt her the most was that he hadn't even objected. It was as if Jamie knew it was coming.

Syd had told Jamie that she would be back later this week to collect her belongings. She told him that he could keep the loft. It was his city after all, she was a Boston girl through and through.

**BB**

After texting Jamie to see what day would work for her to get her stuff she started to think about their happy times. As she packs her things into boxes Jamie had left out for her she feels the tears start to fall. She needs to let Jamie know how she feels. Even though the letters had always been Danny and Jamie's thing, she knew that he would read it. The more she writes the harder it is for her keep the sobs quiet.

After she is done writing the letter, she grabs her boxes and starts to walk out of the building. As she steps into the cold night, her tears start fall harder. With one last look towards their door, she walks away from one of the people she loved the most.

**BB**

After a long shift Jamie was glad to be home. Sydney had told him three days ago that she had a job waiting for her in London that she could not refuse. He couldn't join her and had effectively ended their relationship. He hadn't told anyone yet and was still letting the news sink in. He had gone from engaged to single in a short amount of time. He knew exactly why as well. He knew that Syd was not meant to be a cop's wife. She had been engaged to a Harvard lawyer, something he was no longer. As he fell into his couch he noticed a folded piece of paper on the coffee table. In Sydney's handwriting was his name. As he reached for it he was scared to read it.

_Jamie,_

_From the moment I met you, I fell in love with you. I don't want to tell you all the clichés. But it was never you, it was what I felt, it was all me. Right up to the day that I left, you continued to show me more reasons to love you. I love how dedicated and true you are to your family, especially your niece and nephews. I love you more every time you spend time with Jack and Sean. I was never cut out to be a cop's wife. I'm not strong enough. I want you to find the love of your life, and not it is not me, it is going to someone that is strong-willed, someone that your family adores, someone that will make you happy. It is someone that you will fall head-over-heels for. It is going to be someone that can give you a family that you always wanted. Jamie, all I want for you is to be happy. _

_No matter what, I am always going to love you. You are always going to hold a special place for me. Be safe._

_Sydney_

Jamie didn't know what to say. All he could do was sit and think.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Here is the the new chapter.I hope you all like it. I have some pretty awesome ideas coming up. After this week, I will have some more time to write. On top of applying for Jobs for teaching I plan on writing more. Thanks to my loyal readers and amazing reviewers. CBloom2, stilljustme, riowolf and others you guys keep me writing. Please R&R.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own them. Darn... *plans to take over the world***

**BB**

"Hey kid! Wait up!" Danny yelled after his brother. He had seen his brother walk through the precinct to drop off a perp. He could tell that his brother wasn't very happy, however he didn't know why. He had noticed that Jamie had been kind of absent since the time he had walked in the door for their last family dinner. Sydney had attended family dinners since her and Jamie had moved back to New York. She had told the family that she couldn't see him living in Boston. That New York wasn't her home. She was noticeably missing from their last family dinner. As Danny chased after his brother, he noticed the slump of his shoulders almost as if he was defeated somehow.

"Jamie! Wait!" Danny again yelled at his brother. He was thankful that he didn't have to chase his brother across the street when Jamie stopped just short of the road.

"What do you want Danny?" Jamie asked.

Danny was taken aback by the anger in his voice and the pain plastered all over his brother's face. "Jamie, what's up?"

"I don't want to talk about. I have to get back to shift," Jamie huffed.

"Ok…why don't we meet up after your shift and talk, I'll buy you that beer?" Danny asked hoping to get his brother to agree.

"Yeah, alright I'll meet you here. Don't know exactly when that will be but sure," Jamie hesitated but agreed.

**BB**

As the hours ticked on towards their agreed dinner and drinks, Danny become more and more worried about brother, he had never seen him like this, even when they lost their mom and Joe. He wasn't sure what to think. His overactive imagination began to run wild like it always did at moments like this. He wanted Jamie to tell him what was wrong but, he was a Reagan through and through. He wasn't going to just lay his problems out for everyone to see. He is brought back to the real world when he hears his phone vibrate on the desk.

"Hey kid, what's up?" Danny asked. He prayed his brother wasn't calling to cancel on him he just wants to know what is troubling his baby brother.

"Instead of meeting at the precinct, I was gonna order pizza, if you wouldn't mind picking up some beer, that would be great," Jamie asked quietly through the phone. "I really don't fell up to going out tonight."

"Sure kid. I'll be over in about an hour," Danny replied. "See you in a few."

"Everything alright?" Demarcus asked his partner.

"I sure hope so. I can't handle losing another sibling. "

**BB**

As Danny rode the elevator to his brother's floor he was unsure of what he was going to hear. He vowed to himself that no matter Jamie tells him, he will be there for him. As he lets himself in he smells the pizza waiting for him.

"Hey Danny, go ahead and help yourself, I'll be right out," Jamie yelled from the bathroom. He knew that Danny knew something was up. He can't say he has been extremely upset that Sydney was gone, things had started to fall apart when he started the academy, and he didn't really miss her. He missed her presence. As he walked out the bathroom he heard his brother letting Linda know that he wouldn't be home tonight because it was a boy's night. Jamie smiled at the thought; he and Danny never hung out when Joe was alive. He was beyond glad he still has Danny.

When Danny got off the phone, the air was filled with small talk. About Linda and the boys, about Erin and her ex-husband, Nicky growing up too fast, however once that started to get old, Danny could tell Jamie was starting to become uncomfortable.

"Kid, what's up? You haven't been yourself since the incident in Chinatown. You weren't hurt more than you have let on?" Danny asks worriedly.

"No, I wasn't hurt. Um…" Jamie stumbles over the words. "Sydney left me. She gave the ring back and left me."

Danny couldn't wrap his head around it. He was relieved that his brother wasn't hurt. However he just heard that Jamie's fiancé had left him. He didn't know how to react. He did the only way he knew possible, with laughter and joking.

"Damn I'm sorry kid," Danny said as he put an arm around his brother's shoulders. "How about we go get some more alcohol?"

And with that he finally saw Jamie smile.

**BB**

As the next morning rolled around, both of the Reagan brothers were nursing pretty bad hangovers. Danny's mission had been to get Jamie drunk. They had enough fun that they had actually drunk dialed their sister Erin. While she had been mad at first, she was happy that Jamie was back to his normal happy self, at least drunk he was. The call ended with Erin thanking Danny for getting Jamie back to normal.

"As much as I don't want to go, I have to get Jack and Sean to practice. And then spend time with Linda. Don't forget about the baseball game tomorrow and dinner on Sunday. See ya later kid," Jamie smiled as he heard Danny yelling at him. "Oh and there is a letter on the coffee table, I would recommend being either more sober or extremely drunk when you read it, because I'll admit it, I was completely trashed when I wrote it."

"Thanks Danny! Now get the hell out my apartment before I make you clean up this mess," Jamie laughed. He had definitely needed last night.

When he walked into his living room he saw the letter his brother had referenced.

_Jamie,_

_Tonight has been exactly what you needed. I hate seeing you hurt, even though it sounds very chicklike, which apparently what I am like when I am drunk. Damnit! Anyways I am so sorry that Sydney left, I know you loved her. You will find someone that will love you for who you are not what you are. You are going to find that girl. My hope is that you find someone like mom and Linda, someone who will stand beside you and support you. Ok enough of my damn sentimental side. Next time we do Karaoke! I am so going to kick your ass at that! Face it I am definitely a much better dancer and singer than you. Maybe I should have done that instead. Yeah nope, not happening._

_Danny_

_P.S. Sorry about the mushy crap, next time we leave that to Erin._

Jamie couldn't help but laugh at it.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: This was going to be posted earlier tonight but we had a thunderstorm roll through that was so close it knocked out our power for a second. I definitely needed a thunder buddy for that one. I am hoping to get another couple of chapters out for my stories this weekend. Thank you to my loyal readers and my loyal reviewers. I am still going to thank the same group as last update: riowolf, stilljustme, and CBloom2 you stories inspire me to write more and your kind words of encouragement keep me going and help me with ideas.**

**I am still open to ideas for this story. I have a few that I want to address just have to get them ironed out.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own them, if I did, Danny and Jamie would be my thunder buddies. (if you don't get that watch Ted)**

**BB**

It could have turned out completely different. They both know this. Instead of investigating an assault and murder they could have been investigating a rape and double murder. No blood had been spilled except for the monster, Richard Reed. When Danny heard the call over the radio for a Crime Scene Unit to the Office of the District Attorney, his felt his stomach drop. He effectively held his breath the entire ride to his sister's office. He had tried to call both Erin and his father but neither of them answered.

"Hey Reagan, she is going to be okay," He heard Jackie try to comfort him, yet he could hear the fear in her voice, fear that Reed had struck again and they victim was someone she knew and respected. Someone she was close to.

As they parked their squad car next to the curb, there were police officers everywhere. Danny wanted to sprint up the stairs and into his sister's office just to make sure she wasn't hurt, that Reed hadn't gotten to her. However he didn't want to barge into something he wasn't supposed to hear.

"Danny, hey, let's go find your sister," Jackie urged.

"Yeah, okay," Danny replied as if he wasn't really listening. Honestly he wasn't. He had a one track mind.

Stepping on the elevator, he was in shock at the numerous officers that walked the halls collecting evidence. He knew there had been a murder but didn't know the identity of the victim. Just as the doors were about to close, he spotted Jamie walking in the front door, eyes blown with fear. He knew that face well. Hell he was sure he was wearing that same face right now as well.

"Jamie!" He yelled as he was able to stop the doors from closing.

"Danny, have you heard anything? Where are Erin and Dad? I heard it was here and I…"Jamie started but couldn't finish, for the thought was too scary and could become too real.

"No, I haven't heard from either of them, I don't know where they are at," Danny stated. As soon as he finished the door to elevator opened up the flood his sister worked on. A slight moment of hesitation stopped them.

"We should see if we can find Dad and Erin, beyond that I don't care," Jamie tried to explain logically. He just wanted to know that they were both okay.

"Go find them, I am going to go talk to the lead investigator, see what they can piece together. I'll see you on Monday, take care your family Reagan," Jackie explained.

They couldn't walk down the hallway without bumping into other officers. It seemed like they had multiplied in the short time they had been in the elevator.

The closer they got to Erin's office the more fear they felt. Jamie could almost feel the tension and worry radiating off of his brother. As they stepped over Reed's body, they each blew out a sigh of relief. They didn't need to worry about him anymore.

**BB**

"Lieutenant, I know I fired my weapon, but I would do it again in a heartbeat. That monster was holding daughter hostage. If I had been later it would have been my daughter's body lying on that floor. To me I did what I was supposed to do. Punish me how you see fit, but know that if any of my children were in trouble like this again, I would do whatever I could to protect them," Frank explained, not knowing that his sons were just outside the door.

Danny and Jamie stood shocked. Their dad, the police commissioner of New York City had killed Richard Reed because he had held their sister hostage. They decided it was best to keep searching until they found Erin. They both knew not to interrupt an IA investigation. They didn't have to search much further. As they reached Erin's office, the two brothers exchanged a look of fear and uncertainty. Not sure what they would find they slowly opened the door. What they saw shook them to their core. Their usually unshakable, confident, amazing sister sat on her couch trembling, staring off into nothing. She hadn't even realized that Jamie and Danny had walked in.

"Erin?" Danny quietly asked. He found himself wishing that he had been the one to kill Reed, however he was beyond glad that it wasn't her body that they had to step over. His eyes tearing up at the thought. He couldn't even think of losing Erin. Yes they fought, but he would do anything for her.

"Danny? Jamie? When did you…What are you…" Erin started to ask. Before she could finish she began to sob uncontrollably.

"Hey, hey you're okay, we're here," Jamie whispers as he comforts his sister. But not before glancing at his older brother. As the two brothers try to comfort their traumatized sister, they didn't realize that their father was watching. All that mattered were his three children in a strong embrace. His two sons shielding their sister from the outside world.

**BB**

By the time the four of them had arrived at Frank's house, Linda and the boys, and Nicky were already there. Nicky and Frank led Erin into the house. Linda and the boys comforted Danny and Jamie. They had all decided to stay at Frank's for the night, until they knew that they were all okay.

By the time Erin had awoke the next morning many of last night's guests were gone. She did however notice two letters on the table both addressed to her. She knew that her brothers must have been scared if they wrote these letters. Taking a deep breath she began to read the first one.

_Erin,_

_You have always been strong and confident. Unshakeable would be the word. Last night scared me. When I heard where it was and who was involved I was terrified at what I would find. I am so thankful that you are okay. I would not be able to survive losing you or Danny. You are strong and will get through this. Love ya sis._

_Jamie_

Short and sweet and to the point, that was what Jamie was best at. She was glad that she had Jamie Danny for everything. When they had embraced her in her office, it was the first time since her father had set her in office that she felt safe. She took another breath and read Danny's letter.

_Erin,_

_When I saw you last night, reduced to trembling and not able to put together a complete sentence, I was scared. Scared that you wouldn't be able to bounce back from this. Scared that you would block us out, scared that you would become like me. You are my baby sister, I felt that I failed at one job I was given when you were born. And that was to take care of you. From the moment mom placed you in my arms I have always tried to protect you. I am sorry that I let you down in that respect. I will do anything to help you, to be there for you. If I lost you or Jamie like we lost Joe, I would be devastated and there is no doubt I would not be able to pull myself from that. You are strong, smart, and amazing, don't ever forget that. I love you so much Erin, don't forget that. _

_Danny_

After reading both letters she felt tears falling down her face. She made a vow to herself to make sure just how important her brothers were to her. She was glad that she had Jamie and Danny behind her no matter what happened.


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: I hope you all enjoy this chapter. This chapter was based off of one of my favorite episodes 1x15 Dedication. I wish we could have seen more of the families reaction to this event. I am going to try and update regularly. Thanks to my loyal reviewers. Please R&R.**

**Disclaimer: Still not mine. If they were they would be my minions.**

**BB**

Had this really happened? He was having a nice quiet evening alone with his wife, something that rarely happened and it was interrupted by both a ringing cell phone and a knock at the door. He knew that this wasn't good news. With a deep sigh and a silent agreement that he would get his phone and Linda would answer the door, they split. Without even looking at the cell display he answered.

"Reagan." He sighed.

"Are you home? Gormley was sent over to your house." Jackie asked hurriedly. "Danny," he knew something was up, for she never called him that, "Danny, it's your dad."

"What?" At that time he looked up and saw his boss standing in his living room and a scared look painted on his wife's face. He felt the blood drain from his face. "Jack, I'll um…call you…um."

"Listen, Reagan, I'm…" His boss started, almost afraid to tell his detective what he was there to say. "It's your father, he was shot outside of a restaurant downtown, last I heard he was being rushed into surgery at St. Victor's."

It was as if the world had stopped. He couldn't believe what he just heard. He felt his heart speed up, he knew that if he lost his dad he would not be able to move past it. He had already lost his mother, whom he was incredibly close to. He would not be able to continue to work as detective if he lost his father.

"Danny? Sweetie, hey, let's…go…see how…your dad is. Breathe, hey, he is going to be fine," Linda tried to comfort her husband. To tell the truth, she couldn't think of what the family would be like if they lost Frank.

"I…I can't lose him Linda. He is my dad, I can't," Danny whispered. Then a thought dawned on him, "Linda, what about Jamie and Erin, they…they need to know."

"Don't worry Reagan, we are notifying as we speak. You just need to worry about getting in the car. Let's go," Gormley calmly stated.

Danny felt as if everything was moving in slow motion. Every step he took towards the car, he leaned on his wife a little more. If it weren't for his boss being here, he would have fallen apart even more. As they inched closer to the hospital, Danny sent numerous prayers to his grandmother, mother and brother to help their father here.

_Please, don't take my dad. I still need him. Please._

**BB**

'Oh what a night,' Erin thought to herself. Her daughter was at a friend's house working on a group project. Both her brothers were working and her father was meeting old friends. He was there to ask them to be at the dedication for Joe. She still missed Joe to this day. She wasn't sure she would ever not miss him. Her family was just now starting to get back to normal. She was snapped out of her reverie by her ringing cell phone.

Jackie. What was her brother's partner doing calling her. Unless, something happened to Danny, she couldn't think that way.

_Please don't let it be Danny. I can't lose another brother._

As she answered the phone she took a deep breath as if to ready herself for any news that was came through the phone.

"Hello?"

"Erin? Are you sitting down?" She could feel the tears begin to fall down her face. "Listen, um…your brother is alright," A sense of relief rushed over her, until she heard Jackie take in another unsteady breath. "Your father has been shot. He was been rushed into surgery."

"What?" Erin asked before she could even comprehend what had been told to her. "How he always has a detail and is…" She couldn't finish.

"I have told you everything I know Erin. I know Danny and Linda are on their way to the hospital already. Are you home? I am going to pick you up and take you to your father," Jackie explained. She knew how close the Reagan family was. When one was hurt, they all hurt. She also knew that Erin would be in no shape to drive. "Do not step out of the building until I am there, we don't know if they are going after the entire family or just your dad. Danny wouldn't forgive me if something happened to you."

"Okay, I'll be ready in a few minutes. Call me when you are here. "

She found herself asking her lost loved ones to not take her father, at least not yet.

_I still need him, I still need dad, please don't take him._

**BB**

This day seemed as though it was never going to end. Patrol had been boring as hell and seemed to drag on for what seemed like an eternity to Jamie. After shift he was supposed to meet his brother for a beer to catch up. Ever since Sydney left he and Danny had tried their best to be there for each other more. He was thankful for his family. They had been able to bond together and become closer after Joe.

"Hey Sarge, want to join Danny and I for a beer or two? Just to unwind?" Jamie asked his boss.

"No, me and the wife are celebrating me having two days off in a row. And we made dinner reservations," Renzuilli laughed.

"Renzuilli! Reagan! My office please," Sargent Edwards exclaimed.

"What did you do that would get us in trouble kid?" Renzuilli teased.

"I swear, I didn't do anything," Jamie replied. A knot was forming in his stomach. Something happened.

"Jamie, I hate to be the one to tell you this," Edwards started.

The first thought that popped into his head was something had happened to Danny. He would not be able to survive losing his last brother. Next he thought was Erin. She had made so many enemies putting away criminals.

_Please don't let it be Erin or Danny. I can't lose another sibling. _

"Your father was shot. He was rushed into surgery at St. Victors. Tony will you take Jamie down to the hospital please?"

"Of course. Come on kid, let's go," Renzuilli encouraged. He could tell Jamie was struggling to comprehend the news.

_Please let my dad be okay. We still need him. I still need him._

**BB**

After visiting hours were over the entire family, barring the children, stayed and made camp in the waiting room. Even though she wasn't an outsider everyone else sitting with her was Frank's family. By blood. She was the outsider. She could see it in her husband's eyes. He was scared. Scared that he was going to lose his father, he had worn that mask the entire ride to the hospital. A ride that he spent with his arms around his wife, making sure she was still whole, still with them.

"Linda, babe, are you awake?" Danny whispered. She could hear the weakness in his voice that was never there.

"Yeah, I'm awake. What's up?" Hoping that she could help mend whatever her husband was feeling.

"I was just thinking. Jamie, Erin and I could have easily lost our father tonight. A little bit…" He broke down in his wife's arms.

All Linda could do was comfort him.

"Danny, Linda?" she heard Jamie whisper. "Is…what…"

"No, your father is fine. No change. Come here," Linda motioned for Jamie and Erin, who had just awoken from a broken slumber. She knew they needed someone to be strong for all of them. In a large embrace they prayed that Frank would fully recover, that he would be the same he was before the shooting.

**BB**

As the case unraveled, Danny found himself discovering secrets about his family's history. However the only thing on his mind was that he needed to avenge his father's shooting. Erin and Jamie were sent to the sidelines to help somebody help Danny find out who shot their father.

By week's end they had the suspect in custody and Joe's dedication was a success.

The week had exhausted Frank. With him being shot, the case that followed and then the ceremony, he had just wanted to relax and have a drink or two. Next to his favorite scotch however, he found three letters.

_Dad,_

_When Jackie told me that you had been shot, I was faced with the very real possibility that I could lose you. You helped me through mom's death. You helped me through Joe's as well, even though you were hurting more than any of us. To Jamie, Danny and I, he was our brother. He was your son. I can't even begin to explain what I would be like… I am so glad you are safe. _

_I love you Dad. _

_Erin_

_Dad,_

_Even though I was the youngest I always knew the risks of being a police officer. I knew those well when I decided to become a cop. You always seemed to dodge bullets when I was younger; at least that's what I seemed to think. I thought your luck had run out when I heard you were shot. I kept begging and praying with Joe and Mom to not let you join them. I cannot stand the thought of losing another parent, another person who I loved. Danny, Erin and I would still have each other, but we would not be the same without you around. I am glad you are okay._

_I love you Dad._

_Jamie_

_Dad,_

Last but not least was Danny. He didn't know what to expect from his eldest. He held his breath as read the letter.

_Dad,_

_You are one of two people who knew me best, three if you count Mom. Always to warn me to be careful. To make sure I come home safe every day to Linda and the boys. I know you always got the same advice from mom when you left for shift. I am more like you than you realize. I am your son after all. The other night I thought I'd lost you. I hate to think of what the family would be like if we lost you. Erin, Jamie and I would be a mess. We would have lost so much already we wouldn't be able to survive losing you too. I know you are thinking that as long as we have each other we would be okay. But this time would be different. You mean much more than you realize to us. You are our father. Believe it or not we still need you. We always will._

_I love you Dad._

_Danny_


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Here is chapter 13. Wow I cannot believe it has come this far. I still have many more ideas. A huge thanks to stilljustme for helping with this final draft. Enjoy. Please R&R.**

**Disclaimer: Not mine. If they were we would see much more...yeah nevermind.**

Jamie knew that no matter how hard he tried, Danny would never really share everything that happened to him in Iraq. He knew that the things that he saw over there were beyond words. There were days when he wished he could go back in time and convince Danny not to go. That way he would still have the carefree and fun older brother that he had grown up with.

While Danny had come back, there was still something that was missing from his older brother. While they fought some when they were younger, they fought even more now. Even though Danny had been back for years now he had never really recovered. He hated seeing his brother so broken and upset. He would do anything to help his older brother. When he heard that Danny and Jackie had caught the case of a dead Marine, he knew his brother was not going to take it well at all. He could see his brother falling apart at dinner, when they hadn't caught the guy yet.

He was the only Reagan to go overseas and not go fight in a war. He had no clue what his brother was going through.

"Hey kid," Danny said using his typical greeting for Jamie. However Jamie could see the pain and regret written all over his brother's face.

"Hey Danny, how are you?" Jamie replied hoping to get some sort of answer out of him. Something that would show them just how he was dealing with the case, good or bad.

"I'm doing….not so good. There is a bastard out there that killed a Marine, a hero, someone who won a silver star because he was homeless. To think that it could have easily been me, kills me, if I didn't have you guys…" Danny spilled quietly.

"But you do have us. You will always have us here to help you, even in the most minor way. Please remember that."

"Thanks kid, listen I have to go…I just…See ya later kid," Danny avoided.

"Yeah see ya later," Jamie said quietly.

**BB**

"You know he is always going to be that way, Jamie. Avoid the subject and bottle it all up until he cracks. I hate seeing him like this. I hate seeing anyone like that, but you and Danny just take everything so hard and I can't handle losing either one of you guys," Erin explained as she watched her older brother's family leave. "When I found out about the case, I wanted so badly to make sure we could use the only witness he had. But…"

"Yeah, I know, it's just, what he said to Dad at his service, I can't imagine not having him here either," Jamie trying to comfort both himself and his sister.

"What did he say," Erin asked, "What did Danny say to Dad, Jamie?"

"He said, I keep thinking that could have easily been me, had I not had you guys," Jamie whispered.

"Oh my god," Erin gasped. She let her emotions go as she felt her baby brother's arms embrace her.

**BB**

This case seemed to take everything out of him. He admitted war had changed him and not for the better. He also knew that he had taken his anger out on his family on this case. Danny knew that his family was there for him not matter what happened. The thought that Marine could have easily been him, shook him to the core. He knew he couldn't have left behind Linda and the boys. They were everything to him. His father and grandfather could not handle losing him. Lastly, he thought of Jamie and Erin, he needed to be there for them still. As he made his way into the kitchen he saw two envelopes with his name on it.

_Danny,_

_Please don't ever leave us. We still need you. Jamie and I will always be here for you. I am glad you had the courage to get help when you needed it. I am also glad that you realized you needed help. I cannot even think of not knowing where you were living. You may not be the Danny I grew up with, but you are my brother and I will help you in any way I can._

_I love you Danny._

_Erin_

He knew that his sister wouldn't hold back on how she felt. He felt tears start to well up in his eyes. Next was Jamie's letter.

_Danny,_

_I know how much you struggled with this case, I know that seeing a fellow Marine dead in an alley was hard for you. He was and always be a brother in arms for you. I have no idea how he felt, that he couldn't find the help that he needed to get better or that he knew he had friends to support him. The fact that someone took his life because he was homeless is sickening. _

_I hate seeing you fight those demons that you seemed to round up while in you in Iraq. Please realize that I would do anything I can to help you. As would Dad, Erin, Grandpa, and especially Linda. We all hate to hear you say "What if it had been me?" or "It should have been me." Yes it could have been you, but it wasn't you. If you came home to us shattered like so many have, remember you had and still have us to help you pick up the pieces. I would rather have you home with us broken, than not have you around at all. _

_I can't even think of losing another sibling. I have already lost Joe and I barely survived that. I survived that because I had you and Erin. Believe it or not I still need my big brother. It is the same with Erin, you are her best friend, and she would be shattered if you were gone. _

_I love you big brother. Know you can always come to me for anything._

_Jamie_

He felt tears run down his cheeks and there was nothing he could do to stop them. He silently vowed to make sure he always came home to his family. To his siblings, to Jamie and Erin.


	14. Questionmore ideas please

This is just a question. I have been struggling with studying for a little bit today. However I have had a breakthrough on the end of Lost and Gone. Many of you would like to see how the rest of the family besides Jack reacts to Danny being home. However I do not want to post this part of the story if someone else is already writing it. Would you guys read it if I did in fact post it? I have some ideas for it, but it has not be completely written yet.

I have a few ideas for Letters as well. But after that my story inspiration has kinda run out. If anyone has ANY suggestions (yes I am begging here ;)) please send them my way.


	15. Chapter 14

**A/N: Sorry for the wait on this one and the fake chapter earlier in the week. I wanted to have this posted yesterday but our internet provider has been having massive problems leaving me without internet for 2+ days. I am currently at my grandma's so I can post this. I plan to have part two of the epilogue of Lost and Gone up as well as Reunion within the next few days. A huge thank you to my loyal readers! I thank you for ideas. Please don't forget to R&R.**

**Disclaimer: Not mine...**

**BB**

For the family it felt like they could never get a break. Of course Jamie, Danny, and Erin always had cases that they were working on but none had hit so close to home.

Danny always knew that his father, sister and baby brother were prime targets for anyone wanting to seek revenge. However he never thought that his beloved Linda would be the one threatened. He always vowed that he would lay his life down before he allowed his family to get hurt. However in the past three weeks his father had been shot and his wife had been kidnapped. All because of his job.

He had heard that the Peruvian drug lord was bad news. After Danny had watched him kill David in revenge, because his girlfriend had been seeing the young man. Danny had watched David die in his arms. He had vowed he would make sure the monster went to jail; even it meant having to testify himself.

His sister had warned him to be careful and make sure he came home to his family. It was a sentiment that was shared throughout his entire family.

Linda had warned as well. He consciously changed the subject every time it had been brought up at the dinner table.

It was his job to protect them, however all of that flew out the window when he received the phone call that Linda wasn't answering the door. He wasn't sure what to think. His wife had been kidnaped. All because he was doing his job.

He was thankful that his partner was there to support him and keep him from falling apart. His father had helped in ways that he couldn't vocalize into words. It had been his dad and Jackie that kept him from panicking when they had found a hummer with an unidentified female in the back seat. When he had heard those words, his mind had forced him to think of what his life would be without Linda.

When he had finally reached his wife, he found that he could breathe again. As he held his trembling wife in his arms, he let the tears finally spill over.

**BB**

"Hey Danny," Jamie quietly greeted as he walked out the back door. He had expected his brother to be at his sister-in-law's side the entire night. He had tried to keep his strong façade on when they had walked in the door, as if to not scare his nephews. When his father had told him that Linda had been taken his first thought was for his oldest brother. How would Danny react if his wife had been taken from him? He was thankful that they didn't have to find out. "How are you doing?"

"I'm… doing better," Danny started. He knew that he didn't have to hide anything from Jamie. His brother had become one a few people he could confide anything in.

"Today could have turned out so much different. I was forced to think of what…of what my life would be like without Linda. I can't imagine not having her in my life. Hell, she is my life. I…" Danny started but broke down. He felt his brother's arm around his shoulders. As if to ground him. "You have no idea how thankful I am that you shared that lead. We had nothing; I may have never found her had you not done that research."

"I was just doing my job Danny. I wanted to help in some way, anyway I could," Jamie answered softly.

"Kid, you saved Linda's life and mine. Thank you," Danny tearfully finished.

**BB**

As Danny and his family drove home he was thankful that he still had all three of them. Coming to a stop outside their house he was amazed at everything he had and how easily it could have been lost. As he went to reach for his sons' backpacks he noticed a letter with his name on it sticking out of the side pocket of Jack's pack. Settling on the front porch of his house he takes in the letter that Jamie had written.

_Danny,_

_When I first heard about Linda, I'll admit I was scared. Not for me but for what the family would lose if you lost her. It is certain that we would have lost you. However I was most scared for you. We all knew there was no way you would be the same person. I had to do something to help you guys. Linda is as much my sister as Erin is. I had to do something to bring her home. Do not blame yourself for any of this, for I know your wife does not blame you for any of it. You did your job, you found her, and you brought her home._

_Jamie_

He didn't realize until he was done reading that his wife had joined him on the front steps. Danny finally allowed for himself to breakdown in Linda's arms.

**BB**

As Jamie was leaving for his tour the next morning he noticed a text message from Danny.

_Kid, you have no idea exactly what you did for me and my family. You saved Linda, and you saved me. Thank you. - D_


	16. Chapter 15

**A/N: I hope you all enjoy this chapter. I am sorry for the wait, I have had bad writer's block on this chapter. I knew what I wanted the chapter to be about, 1x22 Blue Templar, hopefully does the episode justice. Please R&R.**

**Thank you to my loyal readers and reviewers, your kind words keep me going. CBloom2, riowolf, accounting professional, ddubgirl and my regular reviewers, THANK YOU and I adore you guys.**

**A very special thanks to stilljustme for helping me figure out this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: Not mine...**

**BB**

Standing in front of his father's house listening to a recording of his brother, only hours before he had passed, thinking that it all had been a lie. His entire family had been lied to. However what got him was the fact that Jamie, his baby brother, was investigating it all. He could have lost Jamie the same way that they had lost Joe. The idea of it was like a punch to the gut, taking his breath away. What is he supposed to think? He doesn't even know the whole story yet.

Taking a deep breath he asks, "Does Dad know?" He is afraid he already knows the answer. Jamie has always been good at hiding things. All he gets in response is shaking of his brother's head. "Okay…"

**BB**

Sitting in his father's living room and listening to what his brother was saying he still couldn't believe that the Blue Templar could be responsible for Joe's death.

"Why did you feel you had to hide this from me?" he heard his father ask Jamie.

"I thought that it would be a way for me to honor my brother," Jamie sheepishly explained.

All Danny wanted to do was tell his brother that everything was going to be okay. That they were going to catch who did this to their brother. He wanted reassurances just as much as the rest of his family did.

How was he going to hide this from Erin and Linda, they deserved to know this just as much as the rest of the family did.

"I'll ask Jackie to help, I know she won't like it but she will help," Danny was surprised he could get that much out.

**BB**

After everything that had gone down in the past two days, Danny was just happy that his family was still intact. He found that as he approached Joe's grave with Jamie by his side, he held back tears. Everyday both he and Jamie went out into the city, hoping they would both come back to the family. And every day, Danny did everything he could to get back to his wife and kids. He just hoped Jamie took just as much caution.

"Danny, I am so sorry for everything this week. It's just I felt I was doing the right thing. I didn't expect this investigation to go the way it did," Jamie tearfully explained. He felt as if he had betrayed his brother.

"How long have you been a part of this?" Danny asked, wanting answers.

"About a week after I graduated the academy. Even though I never told Syd, I think this was the major reason for her to leave. If she only knew what went on after she left…"

"What do you mean?!"

"Someone cut the brakes on my car and caused me to crash into a cement barrier down at the pier about a week ago," Jamie whispered.

"Were you hurt?" Danny asked, thanking his lucky stars that his baby brother seemed relatively alright.

"Just shook up…Danny I am so sorry…." Jamie explained finally realizing that everything could have gone completely different.

"Jamie, I am just glad you are alright. I honestly don't know what I would have done if I lost you…" Danny explained. He knew that the rest of the adults were going to be joining them soon. "Joe, I am so glad you decided not to have Jamie join you…I need him more down here. I miss you, I always will." It was if he was saying goodbye all over again.

As Jamie made his way closer to the headstone, he felt his brother's arm drape his shoulders as if to ground him. "Joe, I will always miss you. I know you are watching out for us here." And with that he felt his brother's embrace tighten as if to reassure each other they were still there.

**BB**

As Jamie slowly made his way back up to his loft he found a letter waiting for him on his door. He knew that it was from Danny and he was pretty sure he knew what it was about. He knew he had caused his brother pain. Stepping into his kitchen he fell into the closest seat he could find. With shaky hands he opened the envelope.

_Jamie,_

_When you had me listen to that recording, it was like a punch to the gut. It had been two years since I had heard Joe's voice. In those two years we were led to believe something that was a complete lie. I never in my wildest dreams would have thought that someone could lie like that to us. _

_When you called me to have me meet you, I thought maybe for a talk, not anything like this. Like I said before it was like a punch to the gut. The thing that scared me the most was that you felt you had to investigate it without any of us knowing. You even left Dad in the dark. If something had happened to you, none of us would have survived it. You are my baby brother Jamie; it is my job to make sure you stay safe. Knowing that we could have lost you to the same group we lost Joe and in nearly the same manner, kills me. I am glad that the whole Blue Templar mess is over, now we finally know what really happened to our brother. Please don't ever hide things like this from the family again. You mean more than you know to this family and to me. Believe it or not I am proud of you and I love ya kid._

_Danny_


End file.
